Reader Question:

i have already been solitary for many years! I am willing to have a relationship once more, and I’m not receiving more youthful! I have met an amazing guy. Both of us currently widowed for more than six years. I put my personal pictures out but not my personal recollections.

I will be concerned because he’s got his girlfriend’s picture-hanging across hearth, and then he asked us to accept that it won’t be eliminated. I know the guy adored her, and that I could not ask him to reject it.

I don’t feel at ease. I do believe i shall feel like I’m the third individual. I’m not sure how to feel about it. Can I acquire some advice right here?

–Alondra H. (Montana)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

This actually is a sensitive concern and one that I get a large number. I would like you to reframe your own notion of this image. The lady over the hearth is not their live, inhaling partner. This woman is a symbol of the loving accessory this guy has the capacity to form.

He requires his responsibilities really seriously. This is an excellent thing! He may also be concerned about the feelings of mature young ones exactly who might look at missing picture since their mom becoming replaced.

When I found myself a news reporter, used to do a profile on a resigned Air Force colonel that has made the leap to online business person. Their wife hosted our very own television crew at their home when I asked if she could give us an on-camera “soundbyte” about his home life, she really gracefully declined by discussing they were newlyweds there was an other woman who’d stood behind that man for 28 decades before she passed away of breast cancer.  This made the colonel provide their a large embrace and assert that she seem with him on digital camera.

My guidance for you: Don’t consider his later part of the wife as a possibility. See the girl as an ally. Removing a photograph will not eliminate their thoughts, but it might drive a wedge in a budding connection with a commitment-oriented guy.

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